On set - film shoot from 8-8 today on only 2 hours of sleep and cramps. Peng san ~ 

Got to get up real early tomorrow but I just needed to take the time to praise and thank God for his grace and his Favour. This sem was a real big crazy mess, part of me was dreading the results and yet afterwards I resigned and leaned on Him, I gave it all to Him and my  GPA actually took a great leap in just a semester. I can't explain this neither do I feel like I deserve this but I am so truly thankful I could squish everyone of you and sprinkle flower petals and potato skins while shouting DAEBAK DAEBAK running in circles. thank you. thank you Lord. 

I'm ready to take this on new semester, game face on biatches. 

All I need for Christmas is you guys. 

Sing like you're speaking. Speaking the lyrics to someone. you may not the best singer you may not have the best technique, but without emotion, you are nothing. Sing it like you mean it. Sing to someone in the world. Remember that.

The last beloved has turned 21. Uphill we go. 

More than I ever asked for. Thank you God for loving parents. 

So here's the kooky me, fulfilling my trolley sitting dreams at 21 years old. Haha 

It's been a week since I turned twenty one and I just thought I'd write a little something - not that I had to write it after a week of turning 21 but I was just too much of a lazy ass to write anything before that - hehe 

Well here I am at 21 - totally fabulous - ok just kidding, here I am at 21, feeling not very much less older or different from when I was 18. Strange isn't it ? How time seems to fly when you're older, and seems to be a forgotten concept when you were younger. People always ask the same question : "why does time fly so fast nowadays ?" - well it doesn't actually, it's just that when we were younger, time was something we never gave any thought to. I truly give thanks to my parents who have showered me with nothing but love despite my rebellion, strong headedness and inflexibility. I must say I wasn't the easiest kid to bring up - I would totally kill my younger self if I had to bring her up. (But then again if understand her difficulties, and why she behaved that way lol)  

Reaching 21, means reaching december, the end of the year. With that said, 2014 hasn't been an easy year - but then again there has never been a year without its ups and downs and such is life - a tumultuous journey. I've had a tough time in school, struggling with self doubt, I haven't had the chance to go for exchange and I've had to let a friendship which meant a lot to me go. 

Well but I do believe that God would have a reason for everything and random people have told me so over and over again, so I'm totally done harping over exchange at this point and I have let it go (: a brand new semester, a brand new year, a brand new start. Here's to even more improvement in what ever I do in school, and here's to more working on whatever I'm good at and improving on my weaknesses rather than beating myself up over whatever I'm bad at. 

Over and over again for months I've asked myself if I was a bad friend for leaving you at your worst. But after hearing from L, I've finally decided to let you go because up till this point, much to my disbelief, you're still lying and you still "don't know what you've done wrong". I think I've made the right decision to let go of this irreparable friendship because I think I deserved better than you going around portraying yourself like an innocent lamb while making Y and I look like complete bitches who ganged up on you. Reflect on yourself and be afraid about people passing judgement over what you have done rather than "what Y and I feel about you".  After hearing that from L, I honestly feel like I shouldn't beat myself up for leaving you because it's really not my fault that things became this way. Acting as if I don't know what's happening and and putting up facades, faking smiles with you. That is not what my definition of friendship is like much less talk about the bond between bestfriends. Your mom has always made this friendship as if it was some kind of unhealthy competition and I honestly have tried to erase everything I know that she's said about me the many years we've been friends, but I don't think that friends are supposed look down on one another and I've had enough. I hope maybe one day you realise what you are doing is wrong and change before you destroy what you still have today. I hope one day you realise Y and I confronted you only because we cared and we couldn't go on living lies anymore because it is the easier option to pretend we didn't know. How many days and weeks we fussed before picking up the guts to want to talk to you about it only to be greatly disapointed by your reaction even before we addressed the issue. P. Thank you for the 7 years of good memories. I don't know if you still come here but goodbye and take care. No more hanging on. 

And from here I will move on ahead to 2015. A brand new year. They often say or so I've heard so many times this past week, enjoy 21, anything after goes downhill. I refuse to believe that. So may my life and the lives of the ones I love only blossom and grow to become better and better as the years pass. How you perceive life is how you will live it. So here's to positivity and appreciation for the little things in life. 

And here's to more beautiful and stronger relationships between me and you- thanks for reading my blog, taking time off to read this teeny tiny weird person's view of life. 

See you soon. Xx 

Photos by: Sweetest Amanda 

Just some of the photos with some of the people who make my world a better place. I am a blessed child. I'm sure the photos did the talking. Thank you so much for coming and all the gifts ( you guys know me so well I can cross off so many things on my wish list even though a majority of the people who came DON'T read my blog- which is amazing ) I know I've probably said thank you a lot of times but I can't express how truly grateful I really am !!! And I am super touched by everyone because a lot of people actually  bothered to ask me if I needed help setting up for the party.

Though most of you will never come here, for those of you that do, I just wanted to say that you were invited to my party because you mean something to me, I've had a great experience/ fun, with you, or you've been there above and beyond for me just when I really needed someone without me asking. 

Well of course not everyone could make it - and for those who couldn't, you've been missed but we'll catch up in time or we've already caught up. 

Much love. Xx

Photog by : timmo, Nadia, Raymond ( this is the first legit time I've seen so many dslrs at a party- there was more than 3) 

wishlist ?

Because many people have been asking, i don't really know the price range so heres a list of things i kinda always wanted but never could bear to buy ? that i categorised to make your lives easy. Thank you so much for your love !

pro tip : avoid soft toys and ornamental stuff becaz i love them but i have no space for them.


price range : $10- $40

Travel wallet ! $29 - doesnt have to be this one but just a nice one lol

forest born book  $29

 Gold raw capsule necklace $39

Gold classic quartz $45 - or smth like that la a crystal necklace

Inspire Diary $39.90

Phone case $36 ? they are all so pretty but idk if it is in our currency or how much shipment costs

notebooks $14 but ^^^ refer to above statement


price range : $50-$60

Vanessa Quartz point $58

price range : i dont know 

decent earphones !

Taylor swift - Made of Starlight perfume ( which you can get at sephora ) $ 70 ?

art of pixar postcards $30 ? supposedly can be found in kino

Princess - vera wang perfume

a mike to record coversssss

price range : BAJILLION DOLLARS 

printing shop

you <3

handmade stuff appreciated too if you wanna do that (:

Beautiful things that are out of everyones budget but you should see because they are beautiful:

satchel
Kate spade wallet
sewing machines  LOL
tutus!

PENNY BOARDS

If all else fails, you can also get me : Zara/ Pull and bear/ top shop/ Kino gift cards - or whatever gift cards that subsidizes the above items (;


But in general I have a weakness for accessories- bracelets, necklaces.. blaa  and stationary ( EVEN THOUGH I HAVE TOO MANY BUT BUTT.. ) other things i like are - adventure time, stitch, spongebob, disney in general, unicorns, sparkly stuff, mint green/ rose gold colour / pastels and YOUR SINCERITY .. thank you for the effort , if you've already got something because i posted too late DONT WORRY.

I like Teal boxes (; if you get what i mean HAHA but anyway spend within your means ok. Thank you so so much.

Look at me , a llama .. I'm fabulous. 

Well here we have finally come to the end of the semester, and I have to say I've never felt greater relief than I have today. This semester has been one of the toughest by far, struggling with rejection, stress and constant self doubt. I kept beating myself over and over again (still do, but I try not to) about being not good enough and I questioned over and over again if I was meant to be a designer, if I'm actually doing the right thing. I'm so bad at type, at hierachy, at layout, I take ages just to plan something out. All these things are relatively new to me because I only picked them up last semester onwards and I've only had the experience of doing one magazine. Looking at my classmates makes me freak out, not because I'm actively comparing myself to put anyone or myself down on purpose but I kind of wonder who would even want to hire when I graduate. It even got so bad to the point Cindy actually indirectly told me during crit not to put myself down all the time but to remember that it is a learning journey. I have to confess that I did learn a lot from her over the entire semester and I've always felt like there hasn't been much meaning to my work till this one so yeah, no regrets. 

All the rejection from Cindy over the last few months has definitely made me a lot stronger - she's not picking on me, she does this to everyone - but it kind of pushed me into a frozen mental state where I didn't know how to move forward and I couldn't do any work because of that. I can't even begin to tell you the amount of times I broke last week and I was about an inch much to giving up. I normally wouldn't break in front of people but I totally exploded into a million pieces in front of my mom because I was freaking out so bad I couldn't hold myself together anymore. Apart from Cindy, I screwed up my choir exam and I felt like I could have done better for creative visual and type. - again beating myself up 

I literally didn't live like a human being, I didn't sleep, I didnt eat, I didn't even have time to pee or drink water or wash my face. ( MANDA I WAS SO THIRSTY THANK YOU FOR YOUR WATER DURING CRIT ) and thank you for calming me down right before crit and for the note and goodies. 

It is however a blessing to realize how many people truly actually do care about me during this period of crazy. From welfare packs and sweet notes. To the text messages and calls to check in on me because I apparently looked terribly stressed out / didn't sound good/ when I was freaking out internally. Simple gestures like offering to buy me lunch because they were on the way to the canteen. These people who were struggling with their own submissions bothered to take that tiny bit of effort they didn't need to make sure I was okay. I was honestly about to give up the day before crit but because of Law, Ray and Jia Hao's words of encouragement it sparked an entire fire to push me to finish  my work for which I am truly truly grateful for. - I cannot express how much this helped me. I am also exceptionally grateful to Raymond for helping me with all my printing whilst rushing his own submissions and Ping for helping me cut up my packaging. Last but not least people like Jo and vivi who listened to me as I was still beating myself up after crit and helped me to realize that there is something else I'm good at although I'm terrible at type. 

I also won't forget to thank God for all his grace in which I repeatedly prayed for when I was freaking out. Things seemed really bad at first, and I thought I was going to have to retain in school or something and when it felt like that I don't deny asking you why. But now, I truly leave it in your hands Lord. 

Love like you've never been hurt before 

NOTHING IS GOING WELL AT ALL . NOTHING. SO DONE WITH SCHOOOL. F****

Kyky be grateful. Thou shalt not have such a complaining spirit. These are just my after bath thoughts. 

On a side note.. Would anyone like to hang on the 7th ?

Is it wrong keep asking to get away ? Even if it's just for a week, id like to go sonewhere else. 

Obsessed with my new mermaid scale-y looking top. Other than that , I'm actually dying. K bye.

Instagram right now is just an almost daily reminder about how I won't ever have the chance to go for exchange. I guess there are other opportunities but it just feels rather shitty as of right now coupled with this terrible semester and having to get by another semester next year while people go on exchange have fun and only have pass fail. This is probably just me being jaded over not getting it.. But ah well.. What to do right. 

Really screwed over by font lab right now. I guess maybe some people may say 'serve you right' for doing last minute work but I swear I have been working really hard on my font but I don't know how it is that I am such a slow worker. All I can do now is leave it to God, cross my fingers, go to school early tomorrow and hopefully wrap it up. 

PLEASE GOD PLEASE. IM SO DESPERATE RIGHT NOW. 

I'm very happy single and I currently have no person I have feelings for. ( just to make things abit clear because it seems like there is a misunderstanding )  

I give all of me to you God. Show me the way. 

My 'chariot'

Daesung^ 

First time I've ever received such a pretty bouquet !!

It was a buttcrack.. How can you not take a pic with a butt crack. 

My first time inside the flower dome at gardens by the bay ! Easily amused so I was pretty entertained (: but I must say it's also quite weird inside - random peacocks and elephants with strange plants. 

Dining under ballz. 

It was a good experience and an honour to be mong's date (: I've never seen him more sharply dressed in all the years we've known each other - apart from social night. This is the first legit time I've worn heels too - and I was wondring why my legs were aching just now but I realize as I type this - GOOD WORKOUT YAY.  

Thanks for being so chivalrous. I'm so so glad that I can actually be who I am when I'm with you ( as well as the rest of the clique - and that we love each other as we are - and we can say offensive things to each other without worrying about offending each other HAHA ). 

All in all I had a great time! I'm sure the pictures did the talking. 

Catch y'all later.