Dark playground

Met up with the home girl at a nice chill cafe near our houses. 

So today like literally just right now, after getting home from work- I got lectured by the mom again because of oversleeping/ falling asleep at night with the lights on and what not which she probably didn't know but SOMEBODY. Whom I won't mention. Told on me along with a lot of other misunderstood stuff which annoyed me but I decided not to argue with the parent. Well so I think falling asleep happens a lot especially now because I find myself in the dark playground where my brain actually wants to do work? But my body is too tired and I don't want to sleep yet because it's the most productive and creative time to do work and if I sleep it off like ignorant people always easily exclaim : "just do it tomorrow!" Then those ideas/ train of thought will be lost. Sure I "noted" my idea down .. Sketched it even. But when I look at it the next day it's a flat piece of thing with no thought and juice behind it rendering it useless. Thus I'm often caught inbetween this too tired to move but I want to do work idea. Leading to me giving myself the "hey maybe I should lie down for a minute to get a little energy back even though this is a bad idea idea." Annnnd then no prizes for what happens next - yes I fall asleep. 

So to sum it up. Mom killed my entire happy day mood which sucks- now I just want hide in my room and not talk to anyone. 

Also I have issues waking up. Like huge issues- ever since I was little actually. And I don't know how to help myself. So comment ! Or something if you ever have like legit good waking up ideas. Don't tell me to set alarms because most of the time I don't hear them or I hear them but then I can't get out of bed. I need to live overseas man. 

It's the point of the semester where I feel like I had enough of this school shit once again. I know I sound ungrateful because I'm extremely blessed to have the opportunity to go to school but I share this love hate relationship with school.  WHYWHYWHY must there be other things to study other than our cores.. I don't understand because one sem is too short a period to learn anything so what's the point of forcing me to take some random ass elective for the sake of your stupid idea of "all rounded learning" when it ends up to become "no rounded learning" because I learnt nothing and instead wasted a lot of precious time.

URGHH